Loadus is Trying to Take Over The World and The Only Way to Stop Them is More House Plant Music
WHO OR WHAT THE FUCK IS LOADUS?
Short answer: I DON’T KNOW.
Still short but longer answer than the first short answer: Skynet meets Bernie Madoff.
Longer Answer: I’M SCARED and I pee a little every time I see Michael Pullman’s face.
It appears House Plant is the only one privy to the games this tyrant plays with the commonfolk.
Or maybe, just maybe…. they’re the only ones strong enough to fight back.
A spooky thought for sure.
I appreciate the band for sticking up for us little guys before we’re all molded into a steel furnace in Brewerytown or whatever Loadus is trying to do with our orifices.
YES, there’s strong evidence linking Loadus to that special day in 2019 that set a Philadelphia record for hipster lobotomies. First reported by The City Root’s undercover investigative journalism team.
One thing I know for sure is that more House Plant music can save our souls.
Don’t believe me? Feast those lustful eyes of yours right here, right now:
WHO IS HOUSE PLANT?
The lead singer, Mr. Smith, is equally arousing as an oddly sultry jazz minx, as he is a bonafide funk rock frontman. Coyd Marx has returned from exile as a reborn man and is back in the mix. Tickling the bass is Zeb, he’s also a member of Great Time, and the drummer is, of course, the Loadus-affiliated bucket fucker, Michael Pullman.
Booboo Baby Spooky Boy, a generic brand Mike Wazowski, is somehow involved as well. I do not understand his existence.
This rag-tag group forms Philly’s self-proclaimed spookadelic rock band that just so happens to be on a powerful mission to raise the world’s vibration with funk-infused jams. The music is filled with wonderfully delicious licks, as you’ll see right from the jump on “Flight Wheel”. It’s quality stuff that everyone can appreciate both for the tasty jams and absurd laughs.
“Colors” is probably my favorite House Plant song and not just because the cover art reminds me of Hunter S Thompson’s, Fear and Loathing.
“If it’s fortune that you’re searching for, be careful what you seek”
The band captured the attention of fans on TikTok last year with their comically dark songs about real-world struggles, such as student loan debt and the effects of the COVID-19 pandemic.
They’re building lore to back their unique identity through an active and hilarious YouTube channel — which of course you’ll find snippets of on Instagram and TikTok and other social platforms because to be relevant you have to post on every social platform known to man these days, it’s ridiculous but necessary, I guess…
This is clearly another societal trend designed by the masterminds of Loadus to numb our brains, leak their agenda into our psyche, and take advantage of our minds in a weakened state. BE WARY YOU BASTARDS, THEY’RE COMING!
“SENTIENCE”
House Plant is creating a fascinating and fun image for themselves in an intriguing Adult Swim-like universe, but their music is some seriously high-quality shit, and their songs have a natural relaxed energy that works in line with the humor. Their 2018 single “Sentience” creates a feeling of nostalgia while simultaneously giving off futuristic vibes.
Be sure to keep up with all the House Plant’s haps by following them on Insta @houseplantband and checking out the band’s new website houseplantband.com!
more mUSIC
