A Good Old-Fashioned Passionate Ass-Whooping
A slice of humble pie every once in a while is just good for you.
If you’re real reckless with it, you might end up forgetting to abide by the basic guidelines of humanity; namely:
TREAT OTHERS THE WAY YOU WISH TO BE TREATED YOURSELF
That kind of mindset and subsequent behavior can roll itself into a douchebag snowball, padding itself down a hill with ego pumps. If you’re living life like thattaway / let’s all hope there’s a fist coming for your face today.
Living life you can’t get punched in the face for being an asshole? It’s not a good way to live.
You can’t be walking around life like your shit don’t stink. It could make you a shitty person over time.
Sometimes a slice of humble pie can bring us back to reality, like the video above. Hopefully the dickhead toying with the metal cowboy let that be the last time he puts his hands on someone for no good reason again.
But a real, old-school ass-whooping?
That’s not a jab to the grill. That’s the kind of thing that’s built up on years of douchebagery.
It’s the repercussion of getting away with too much for too long, as Lady Kharma looks grew stronger.
Until she introduces you to the wrong motherfucker at the wrong motherfuckin’ time.
Next thing you know, your jaw hurts and you don’t know why, but you sure as shit know that you dookied in your drawers. You know because of the smell.
And now you really know that your shit stinks.
The little bully definitely shit himself. He lost motor control which can attach itself intestine functionality when you get your shit rocked. Poopy butt.
Let’s face it, society today is much softer than it once was.
So many of us live in a cushion. Even if our finances are out of order, we’ve got some basic health issues, we just got dumped, the family turmoil is boiling… this first-world life isn’t as tough as we like to make it seem.
I’m not saying life’s not tough. It is. Just not as tough as say, olden times.
Our ancestors worried about sabertooth tigers and being bludgeoned to death by neighboring tribes.
I’m bothered if there’s a mouse in the house.
What I’m getting at here, is that sometimes eating a punch in the mouth is actually chicken soup for the soul.
As a great philosopher once said, “Whatever happened to catchin’ a good old-fashioned passionate ass-whoopin’ and getting your shoes, coat, and your hat tookin’?”
Sometimes we get too high and mighty for our own good. Unappreciative of the wonderful life we have in front of us, despite whatever challenges we face.
The Chiefs found that out on Super Bowl Sunday.
if you try hard enough, you can always find a way to bring the Super Bowl LIX champion Philadelphia Eagles back into the conversation.
Did I use a life lesson to further boast about the Eagles being one of the best football teams to ever step on the field? You’re goddamn right I did.
In one way or another the Chiefs would stir up their dark magic and utilize their zebra poaching tactics to come out on top. Even though they underperformed throughout the season and barely squeaked out wins against some of the worst teams in the league they still came into the game with a 17-2 record and many deemed them the favorite.
They had the opportunity to cement themselves in football history as the first to win three Super Bowls in a row. Mahomes and Reid, working to claim GOAT status against the likes of Brady and Bellicheck. An unfathomable feat less than a decade ago, now stark reality.
The Chiefs came into the game confident.
Mahomes dressed in Eagles green.
Kelce dressed the way Kelce dresses.
But far and away the biggest knock was the 3-peat chatter. On one hand it was warranted and, ya know, true. The Chiefs had more than earned the right to talk about themselves as an all-time great dynasty.
On the other, it felt like a slight dismissal of Philadelphia. They sought out the copyright to the 3-peat from Pat Riley and the Eagles took that personally.
But with all the hoopla behind them, the score was settled on the field. The Eagles were the more imposing and physical team, they were more skilled, they were hungrier, they were BETTER.
If you count the first four games of the season as a preseason (in which we should’ve went 3-1), than I think it’s easy to consider this Eagles team the best of all-time. If not one of the top five teams ever.
