Things That Butter My Biscuit Vol. 1
You know what I mean.
Those little moments of life that break through the mundane and give you a little extra juice. That make life worth the squeeze. The stuff that gets the blood rushin and the vitals jumpin.
And I’m not talking about the scent of a beautiful woman. I mean, I am, but I’m not.
I’m talking about a truly embarrassing loss for the Dallas Cowboys. Like every home playoff loss they’ve endured over the last 20 years.
Some might say the first beer amongst friends after a long week at work… a beer or other, choose your vice.
I’ll get to the actual list in a moment but here’s the TikTok that inspired this list that I was too embarrassed to keep on instagram… when you’re on your way to the shore, biding the traffic outside of the city, waiting for things to open up so you can unpack and race to the beach to get your toes in the sand, but the Expressway is backed up…
BUT THEN… the lanes open up from 2…. TO FUCKIN’ 3… REV MY ENGINE. BUTTER MY BISCUIT.
LET’S GOOOO
1. A Cowboys Playoff Loss @ Home
The unequivocal number one. Even when the Eagles win I’m always thinking about how they can do better.
But the bi-annual Cowboys home playoff loss is sweet in any way shape or form… if it’s close it’s a bigger heartbreak, if it’s a blowout it’s a bigger embarrassment. I’ll take either.
2. An ice cold shift drink
… having shift drinks in college is what made me appreciate a good beer and there is no better beer than a cold, tasty, hard-earned brewski after hauling kegs and beer cases up and down stairs all night long.
2A. A perfect spicy margarita
2B. A perfect espresso martini
3. A good Wordle
…Getting a Wordle correct with only 2 or 3 letters in green… if this happens I’m bound to have a great day. Lowkey feel unstoppable and like everyone else is beneath me.
4. A New Personal Record (or Pr)
Lifting a heavy weight easier than expected…. POWER.
5. The right song at the right time
… this goes double for the radio but even on Spotify/Apple music it’s a treat.
6A. It’s still pretty sweet when you choose it yourself. I remember introducing “Moondance” to a girl I was dating on a car ride home after a night out and in lead up to a night of love making… perfect.
6. They Let you Turn Left First
When you’re waiting at the light to make a left and there’s a huge line of cars going straight and the first person Opposite You lets you go through … the person who lets me through — man, woman, alien, other — I’m indebted to you for life.
7. The first page of a notepad
… this is probably only me but there’s so much potential on this blank page. Will it yield the first page of the next great American novel or some subpar dick jokes, we shall seeeeeeee, my friend.
8. Knowing something other people don’t know
… I get to show you how smart I am AND teach you something? Supreme satisfaction.
9. A New Fit
… Wearing a new outfit you’ve been waiting to wear and it looks as good as you thought it would look … first day of school vibes but in adult form.
10A. Going Out
Going somewhere that you wanted to skip out on and it’s actually a great time … it was worth it!!
10B. Not Going Out
Cancelling plans to stay in and it was the right decision… it was worth it.
We’ll see if this becomes volume 1 of many or a one-off, but I enjoyed this pondering of life’s random perks.